Why I Don’t Blog That Often

As I write this title, Lizzeth, realizing she hasn’t seen me in 30 seconds, crawls to me in tears and begs for me to hold her. With a sigh, I pick her up. Maybe this is why I don’t get to blog as much as I’d like. It’s worth it of course, but sometimes I wish I didn’t have to hold her. Sometimes I wish she would be happy with dad, or a brother or sister, but she’s not. She is a full on momma’s girl. Always has been. I love it, but at times it’s overwhelming. She doesn’t care for her toys, unless in toys you mean, bits of paper, plastic, grass, or dead flies she finds on the floor after we have swept for the tenth time in two hours. Then she looks at me, giving me her best gummy smile and my heart melts, and I forget all those moments that her fussing bugged me. I pick her up and love her, feeling her breath on my neck, maybe get a slobbery kiss from her, and for a moment I’m lost in her sweetness. So, maybe I don’t get to blog as much as I’d like, or anything else for that matter, but I’m ok with that. The snuggly time will be over so quickly that when I think about it my heart breaks a little knowing she’s growing up. In another few months she’ll be on her way to walking, running, getting into even more things then she does now, and needing me less. This saddens me but I know it has to happen. For now, living in this moment, I will love her, snuggle her, get sweet slobber kisses, naps together on the couch, and blog less.

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